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Teen Grief Information and Resources Teens Coping With Death

Teen Grief:
a cluster of emotions such as sadness, anger, guilt, frustration, fear, anxiety that automatically occur when someone has experienced a loss.

Grieving:
The process of experiencing the physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual responses to loss or the perception of loss.

Teen Response to loss:
In the teenage years, people are in the process of examining the values and beliefs they learned as children and then defining their own values and beliefs. They are struggling with the questions: "Who am I?", "How does the world work and what is my place in it?"

Coping with a death and experiencing grief during this stage of development can cause further challenges in struggling with these questions because they are torn between wanting to be independent and needing support from their parents and family. Consequently, teens' feelings about death and loss may be conflicting and very intense.

Because of this need for independence, teens turn to their peers for grief support and understanding. When teens are grieving, they may not be able to find help within their own circle. Teens may also try to hide their grief because they don't want to be pitied or viewed as weak or as being different. The experience of grief increases a teen’s sense of isolation.

Teens who are grieving and coping with death can be helped by:
  • a person or group of people their own age who are also grieving and can understand and share their experience
  • close friends who may not share the experience but have acquired some knowledge and skills about grief support and who are willing to listen
  • a trusted adult who listens and can give positive grief support
Signs of teen grief:
  • lack of concentration
  • declining grades
  • loss of interest in usual activities
  • over-activity, acting too busy (trying to block out the pain)
  • wanting to be alone all the time
  • deep sadness
  • drug and/or alcohol use
  • eating too much or not at all
  • risk-taking behaviors
  • self-destructive, anti-social or criminal behavior
  • promiscuity or prostitution
  • thinking about attempting suicide
Adapted with permission from The North Shore Grief and Loss Resource Centre